???

should i give up everything ?

including you ?

god ! i m so ..........

well , i love her much ! =(

but she is not in love with me anymore .

The reason

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with every day
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you

And the reason is you
And the reason is you
And the reason is you

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

blog is the way i can only release my stress here

who know ?

who know what the feeling of me right this moment ?

i got a lot of stuff to think .

honestly to say ,

i m upset for everymoment .

i done a lot of stupid crazy thing for this past few day .

ya , i know that no more turning point for me .

is all because of me , i should not try to do so at 1st but its now too late for everything .

i ruin all the things .

yea , the way i ruin this thing not means that i m really so bad enough .

i know what wrong that i m doing , that is from my chong dong .

i admit that she make the right decision to dump me away and away because i hurt her much .

my word which are just treatening her , i should understand her feeling when the time i not yet say about it .

why i m so stupid antd always do such sucks stuff ?!

who know my feeling for now ?

everything changed .

the way she treat me for now are totally different from the first time we meet up .

i m upset but then i know that is karma for me .

i know that the way she treat me now is what i should get for now .

i trying my best to get back her even whats crazy stuff also i did ady for my last chance also i still failed , thats what i expect earlier from that .

i m sorry for everything .

i just hope that ur life will getting more and more bright ! hope that u happy just like the colour of rainbow .

smile always .

i cant be the perfect partner for u .

so that i should give up everything for now .

this is what should i get at last , i know .

dun worry on me . i m okay .

i just can say that i love you always .

u deep inside my heart

hard to get someone who can replace it anymore .

between , i promise that i surely will be more and more good than before .

thanks you for all the happy memories u give to me , i love to be with u .

eventhough i cant hav the last hug from u , i cant hold ur hand anymore ,but i still can feel the warm that given by u all the time .

i know its hard to forgive someone who hurt u deeply , i know is hard to replace the heart that u already heartless towards me , but i can tell u truely from my heart that i already try my very best .

i done a lot of things that i never do it before .

i love myself , i love u too .

i love the thing u gave to me .

i love to be acc by u .

well , u are always the good listener for me .

thanks for all the shiny days v pass through before that u gave to me .

i will always remember it =)

yea , imma damn stress and pressure for now .

those stuff kill me soon .

65 drawing i have to finish up in a very shorten time .

i cant even draw a nice thing for nw .

65 drawing is actually not really hard for me but u know where my stress come from ?

is the night when i m trying to draw smth about her but few hour i stone at there i still cant get the way to start it !

who understand my feeling on that time !

D len is only the one who tell me = c.w , how u gonna draw out a things for now ? once u look on her pic that appear on ur lappy , ur mind cant be relax again .u giving urself too much of pressure already !

but i cant stop it . no one can stop it . who can dunwan think about his partner that nice to her before ?

i never complain to anyone about my stress on my work .

because thats my choice to study in this programme .

i expect it earlier ago .

but i also need someone who can be my listener always .

last time was she , but now is no one .

honestly seriously i want to share my thing with her but then i cant get back her heart anymore

everytime once i share my thing with her , i will getting more and more comfortable .

wowww..my life nowaday really sucks .

its hard to balance all the stuff that in my mind for now .

who can be my listener for now ?

can someone talk and hav fun in call together with me when i m stress ? no one who can replace it even dlen .==

as u ppl know , i damn dun like to gossip by ppl .

well , nowaday i m just like a ppl who can be their target to be gossip.

i m so scare for everyday .

i dun like to face any of my fren for now .

eventhough i m going to sg soon , who know whats inside my heart .

i just dunno how to face everybody who will be going together .

everything become worst .

but i cannot blame on anybody because all this trouble is come from me .

again , me the one who makes thing worst !

god , teach me what to do for now okay or not ?

i m trying my best to do my all work perfectly before i go to sg why i just cant do it properly ?

where is the spirit ?

my right hand ! why u always shake ?!!!!

u shake until i cant draw out a straight line u know !!

go away from me .

no one who can be my listener anymore pls .

god , can u just forgive me pls .

i promise u my GOD , i surely will be the perfect one after this .

i already try my best .

can u just try to relax me pls .

the day that most hard for me to pass .

chean wei

18/05/2011

4pm sharp !

you are the only

again something trouble was happened on us ,

its the same mistake that i repeat again on this time .

because of my stubborn,

because of my sensitive,

because of my attitude ,

u finally give up toward me .

i know i promise u before that once it happened again i will only accept the decision u make .

i know i should keep the promise but then i hav to say sorry about that because i say the wrong thing , i really need sometimes to change . no one who know i will repeat it again in 3 day time .

i dun hope such thing happened on me too .

i know u already try ur best to give me a lot of chance ,

i love you,

its my fault that i din appreciate it .

i just hope that things will got the turning point , i really dunwan to los u .

as i say i promise that i will change it within a week time or 2 week time .

u know most of the time i dun means it but then my word that really too hurt u .

i apologize about it .

i din means to treaten u , just the way i talk . omg ! i hate myself much until i dunno how to explain to u .

i m regret on wad i said to u . that time .

i m always protect u .

i worry u all the time .

i hope can be the angle for u always .

i m so selfish , i hope that i m ur prince ! =)

i hope i can be the one who always acc u when u are alone although i know u used to be alone .

i hope i can cook for u when u are busy .

i hope i m the one who u will call when i insomia or nightmare , but i dun hope u will get this kind of thing happen again la because i dunwan my dear so scare and cant get into sleeep . =)

i hope i m the one who can always draw for u .

i hope i m the one who can share everything with u .

i hope i m the one who can help u tidy ur thing .

i hope that i m the one who can plan everything with u .

so many the hope and the hope...

i wish all the hope can be real .

v got a lot of memories .

do u still remember ?

try to recall back .. v are actually can stay smoothly and happily .

v are actually a perfect couple .

just always the same thing happened , my bad attitude which always cause it ! i hate myself much ! now only i regret ! i know that too late for me .

but i really hope that u will try to give me a chance . i will prove all the thing .

v are couple wad, v planned a lot , not so easy to let a good one away from us right ?

everything v can solve right ?

just need the time for us to calm down and settle it right ?

no one of the couple which will broke so easily one ma right ?

try to be consider okay ?

glad to hav the chance be ur bf , its my pleasure .

dun feel any stress when read this kay ?

just try to be relax okay ?

a lot of them who really look good on us my dear ...

i dun hope the relationship that gain by us together gone so easily .

v work hard for this , v just cant waste it just because for the stuff okay ?

trust me ,

i will work harder and harder for all the thingy .

i will arrange all the thing .

and dun worry ,

i like to say smth but i really din mean it .

i will try not to say those sensitive okay ?

i will never leave u alone .

and i never chg my mind , i will still go sg even that i told u that i dunwan to go .

so dun worry okay ?

i m a gentleman i wont throw u alone seriously .

dear . i miss u badly but then i not really dare to find u anymore .

i scare that i m annoying for u .

hope that i m not actually .

i so feel want to hug u right now .

love u from the bottom of my heart ! its truth !

let us work hard again for continue our this relationship okay ????

marry to me as my gf for this moment, okay ? but marry to me as my wife in the future that dunno by us , okay ?

<3

i heart you , MELISSA TAN

by UR SO CALLED PUI AR PUI ....

THE DAY I WENT TO KL FOR YOU

well , i done a crazy action for only want to accompany u that day .

actually i planned wanna back to hometown on that time but then suddenly smth pop out in my mind tell me that i miss you lot and i want to accompany u my dear...

thats why i try my best to get myself go to kl on that day .

yea , few day few night that i been there .

although v less outing and all the time was in home for work but i feel that it quite happy actually . this because the person i together is with u .

v enjoy all the time , v do our own work together .

v cook .

v chit chat .

so fun right ?

the happiest moment sure is the cooking lesson from u to me ! hahahhahaa .

i dunno how to cut potato ! omg !!!!!!dun laugh at me pls .

i miss the moment that u suddenly call me pui ar pui ... lol ! so funny .

i love to hug u .

and i keep complain to u that why all the time i been home .

hahahha ! pls dun mind about it okay ?

i know u try ur best to bring me out on the last 2 night !

i know u try to bring me for movie at the last night !

dear,

actually u no need to do so because i m just say it .

i m so happy together with u .

and i dun mind that always at home u know ? i saja want kapsiao u la ! hahahaha

between , the movie that intro by u really nice la !

somemore because of i say want go klcc then how tired u are but u still bring mr to klcc for only the lunch ! u do lot for me ! i appreciate it !

u love the mickey that draw by me to u ?

got paste it on ur wall ? hahahhaa

thanks for the drawing stuff ya !

u late to coll also because of me , i fall as sleeep ! actually i told u that i will wake u up because i tot i just want to look on u when u sleep . manatau i too tired already ... sorry about that ...

the next day i get the punishment , i m also lack at last i choose to skip it ! omg !!! i promise myself i cant skip anymore . back to puncture collegues life !!!!!xD

i m so happy for all the day actually although i have to do a lot of stuff that i never did at home before at there just like wash all the plate (wa... u always chg the new plate ),tidy ur room when u are in coll (geli lo bawah katil u .. hahahhaa ),sweep the floor when u are still in the sweet dream (wa just realise i really like asam lo ! ) , ppl say want help me wash cloth but at last i hav to wash it by myself and hang it and keep it (wow...tiam lo ) , someone keep order me dafei ar da fei , ni hen hao de ma hor , ke yi bang wo this and that ma (hahahahhaha! i love you ), cook the water (much hor...... many many time that i cook ! is u drink much or me ?!) a lot a lot larrr ... hahahha . bt thanks u for the facial u try to make to me ... really good hor ????

u happy for those moment that together with me ?

for me , i am always happy for that and it still the same will always pop out in my mind . i will recall it all the time and laugh by myself . =)

thats all la ... to be continue =)

love u melissa tan !

chean wei lim

i sucks !

out of control

its finally get sick flu plus fever omg after the few day non stop from here to there and back again to normal .

but still there a lot of stuff have to worry about .

expecially u .

miss <3

good night

as what i told you ..

u still remember i what i said when i was beside u on the night ?

i said that i will write down all the fault from me once i make the mistake again right ?

i do remember always , as u know i damn lazy to update the blog ...

again , u speechless towards me .

my stubborn is could ruin all the things .

i always do the things it will only dissapoint you .

i never give u any of the happiness .

i know u are tired to be with me .

i know this relationship it make u aches for lots of time .

i do think about it too, i know that i aint perfect , i m not the bf who can u rely at all .

but then u keep on give me the chance , i do appreciate it always but then my bad attitude is pop out again and again .

i do try my best until i dunno what to do for the next right now .

i really do try my best already .

i know all my bad attitude last long ago .
i want to change too .

i do need someone who can tolerate me for sometimes and also dun mind what the wrong word that i say for sometimes ,by the way she will teach me about it because i doesnt mean to hurt u .

u give me a lot of chance , i know u are always try ur very best to give me the chance , but then i seems like not really appreciate it ..

sorry for that , i really trying my best ..

i got a lot of stress .

thinking much of way for everything not only u and me .

there are also the way to sg .

u know i wont leave u alone go to sg , honestly i done a lot of thing just because of u although i know that u dun need it .

u my gf , i proud to be ur bf . that not easy for u to choose me i know .. i suppose to be the perfect one but then i failed ..again and again .

i do ask myself for a lot of time , why i cant handle all the thing . v suppose is the perfect partner if without argueing about those thing .

i know all that can be solve but then again is me ruin all the thing .

v plan for the future at 1st but is me again who ruin everything until today u take us no future anymore ,.

yea , its hurt when i heard what u told me but then i know the hurt that in ur heart surely more than me .

i am a man , i hav to bare for everything .

u my gal , i suppose to protect u for everytime .

but then i make u cry for the time ..

i cant even forgive me about that ..

i feel myself really bad ..

u know what ... when the time u cry , the feeling of cry it come to me too but then i know i cant ....

i have to console u .

lend u my shoulder .

i love to hug u .

i wanna have the time that only with u because v just meet once for a long time .

at here , i just can say that ..

if u really feel that u want to leave me ..

u can just tell me ..

i will accept everything because i know that i really hurt u much ..

i dunwan to leave u but then i cant to be selfish ..

i love u that why i have to support all ur decision ..

as what u told me , we ll see ...

until the time u feeel that u cant bare anything more ..

until the day ur heart get lock and wont be open anymore ...

i always hope that v can be the best couple ...

and so , i will still keeep trying my best to handle all the thing kay ?

dear, i do love u much .

as u say u dun like i talk the sweet word , so that i can only say it at here .

i never treat u as gina kia . i just feel that i m only the gina kia in front of u . i so noob , i so ben , i cant control everything well .

lastly , i hope that our relationship goes smoothly until the day u dump me ..i promise that i will appreciate all the time that be with u . now u know that why i always just want to have the privacy time with u , i can just say that i wanna appreciate all the chance that can be with you and not to be disturb by the outside thingy .

i m not desprate , its just because i scare to los u and i scare no more the chance anymore .

i respect you .

thanks you .

i will never broke any promise anymore .

god will punish me .

i swear for what i said .

who is ?

Oh, i was perfect
For the circus
if she dared me, i do it
Love makes you stupid
i gave it up, But i guess it was not enough
Cause she never seemed satisfied

i Know i'm not perfect
But at the end of the day
Who is ?

she wanted someone thats perfect
Well Okay
But can you tell me Who is ?

she set the bar
Just above the stars
A rocket could'nt reach it
But i still kept on reaching
she watched me try
At least a thousand times
If she loved me, She'd stop me But noo

i Know i'm not perfect
But at the end of the day
Who is ?

she wanted someone thats perfect
Well Okay
But can you tell me Who is ?
I saw something worth my future
So wrong So wrong
In my mind i was all it took
But i guess i wasn't wrong

i Know i'm not perfect
But at the end of the day
Who is ?

she wanted someone thats perfect
Well Okay
But can you tell me Who is ?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kxEn36djjCA&feature=related